How many conservatives does it take to change a light bulb?

One; after reflecting in the twilight on the merit of the previous bulb.
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When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life,

but I don't want one of them for my husband".

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Do you know what the Queen's father was called?

King.
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How many Wardrobe people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

"Nobody said I needed doubles on that!"
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What did the baby corn ask the mother corn?

Where is pop corn?
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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
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If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?

H2O cubed.
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What did the snail say when he got on the turtle's shell?

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
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What room can you not go into?

A mushroom!
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