How many conservatives does it take to change a light bulb?

One; after reflecting in the twilight on the merit of the previous bulb.
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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Why are there fences around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!
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Making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card
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Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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What's black and white and red all over?

A blushing zebra.
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What kind of pants do ghosts wear?

Boo-Jeans.
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