How many conservatives does it take to change a light bulb?

One; after reflecting in the twilight on the merit of the previous bulb.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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And how come her cell phone bill was so high?

She was a Roman (roamin) Catholic
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How many fundamentalists does it take to change a light bulb?

None; the Bible doesn't mention any light bulbs.
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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy
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What is Donald Trumps favorite song?

ICE ICE Baby......
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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper
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