How many conservatives does it take to change a light bulb?

One; after reflecting in the twilight on the merit of the previous bulb.
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What kind of phones do people in jail use?

Cell phones
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Well, first let's talk about the concept behind this whole "light bulb" thing.
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What is Claustrophobia?

The fear of Santa Claus.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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What kind of jam can you not eat?

A traffic jam.
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So I was on a train with Einstein and he turns to me and asks...

Does Boston stop at this train?
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon!
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