How many conservatives does it take to change a light bulb?

One; after reflecting in the twilight on the merit of the previous bulb.
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What's in the middle of nowhere?

The letter H.
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Why is Superman's costume so tight?

Because he wears a size "S".
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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What room can you not go into?

A mushroom!
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What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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What did the baby corn ask the mother corn?

Where is pop corn?
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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