How many cops does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. It turned itself in.
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Whats Donald Trump's favorite nation?

Discrimination.
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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What day of the week tastes the best?

Sunday!
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What do you call a story about a broken pencil?

Pointless
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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