How many cops does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. It turned itself in.
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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How many accountants does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What kind of answer did you have in mind?
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What do you call a cow with three legs?

Lean beef.
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Do you know how to save a drowning lawyer?

Take your foot off his head.
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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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What's the only difference between Donald Trump and Bozo the Clown?

Bozo The Clown has real hair on his head.
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