How many data base people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three:

One to write the light bulb removal program,
one to write the light bulb insertion program, and

one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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What do lawyers and sperm have in common?

One in 3,000,000 has a chance of becoming a human being.
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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then

*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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I bought some shoes off of a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with

but I've been trippin' all day.
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Why did a boy thow a clock out the window?

To see time fly.
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What do you call a wheel made of iron?

A ferrous wheel.
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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Which reindeer likes to clean?

Comet
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