How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.
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What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground beef.
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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?

None, because they were copycats
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What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?

OH SNaP!
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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Why did Venus have to get an air conditioner?

Because Mercury moved in.
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What does Santa like to do in the garden?

Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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What is worse then having one baby screaming?

Two babies screaming!
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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