How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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Have you heard the joke about the butter?

I better not tell you, it might spread.
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What is Donald Trump telling all his supporters?


Orange Is The New Black.
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a gigolo?

A gigolo only screws one person at a time.
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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