How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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What's the only difference between Donald Trump and Bozo the Clown?

Bozo The Clown has real hair on his head.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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How many magicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends on what you want to change it into.
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What robs you while you're in the bathtub?

A robber ducky.
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There were two cows in a paddock. One of the cows says, "moo"

and the other one says, "That's what I was going to say."
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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