How many dull people does it take to change a light bulb?

One.
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.
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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything – loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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What does a cat call a hummingbird?

Fast food.
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How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.
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A jump-lead walks into a bar.

The barman says "I'll serve you, but don't start anything"
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Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.
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Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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How many teamsters does it take to change a light bulb?

``Twelve. Ya got a problem with that?''
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