How many economists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assume the ladder and one to change the bulb.

A': None. If the government would just leave it alone, it would screw itself in.
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Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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Trump: "It's not a toupee,

I just found the Bush that Jeb lost."
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Why was 6 afraid of 7?

Because 7 ate 9.
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What is green and pecks on trees?

Woody the Wood Pickle.
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What's an alligator's favorite drink?

Gator-Ade.
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What do lawyers wear in court?

Lawsuits.
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How do you make a fire with two sticks?

Make sure one is a match!
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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