How many economists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assume the ladder and one to change the bulb.

A': None. If the government would just leave it alone, it would screw itself in.
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Why do they bury lawyers under 20 feet of dirt?

Because deep down, they're really good people.
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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What's the difference between a tick and a lawyer?

The tick falls off when you are dead.
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What did one hair say to the other?

It takes two to tangle!
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What cell phones do travelling nuns use?

Virgin mobile.
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I'll call you later.

Don't call me later, call me Dad.
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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How many teenage girls does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One, but she'll be on the phone for five hours telling all her friends about it.
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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