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How many economists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two. One to assume the ladder and one to change the bulb.
A': None. If the government would just leave it alone, it would screw itself in.
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What did the belly button say just before it left?
I'm outtie here!
Tom: I bet I can make you say purple.
Joe: How?
Tom: What colors are in the American flag?
Joe: Red, white and blue.
Tom: I told you I can make you say red.
Joe: You said purple!
Tom: I told you I could make you say purple!
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Where do ghosts buy their food?
At the ghost-ery store!
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What do moms dress up as on Halloween?
Mummies!
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How many supply-siders does it take to change a light bulb?
None. The darkness will cause the bulb to change by itself.
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How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
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How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb
None, sound engineers don't do lights
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I just watched a program about beavers.
It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then
*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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Where do all the letters sleep?
In the alphabed.
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