How many economists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assume the ladder and one to change the bulb.

A': None. If the government would just leave it alone, it would screw itself in.
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Online money has recently been discovered to be a not-yet-identified super heavy element.

The proposed name is: Un-obtainium.
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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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What has four legs, a trunk, and sunglasses?

A mouse on vacation.
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If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
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Why can't Donald Trump be a Lannister?

Because he never pays his debts.
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How many mystery writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two — one to screw it most of the way in and the other to give it a surprise twist at the end.
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What do you call a Disney Princess that supports Donald Trump?

Snow White Supremacist.
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Why did the basketball player bring his suitcase to his game?

Because he traveled a lot.
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What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

Is that you mommy?
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