How many economists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assume the ladder and one to change the bulb.

A': None. If the government would just leave it alone, it would screw itself in.

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What goes tick-tock, bow-wow, tick-tock, bow-wow?

A watch dog.

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What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

Is that you mommy?

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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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What did the snail say when he got on the turtle's shell?

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

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Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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What do you call a loony spaceman?

An astronut.
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What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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Why should you never tell a secret in a corn field?

Because there are too many ears.
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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