How many economists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assume the ladder and one to change the bulb.

A': None. If the government would just leave it alone, it would screw itself in.
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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I swear, the other day I bought a packet of peanuts, and on the packet it said "may contain nuts." Well, YES! That's what I bought the buggers for!

You'd be annoyed if you opened it and a socket set fell out!"

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Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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What do clarinetists use for birth control?

Their personalities.

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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras
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What's an alligator's favorite drink?

Gator-Ade.
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What nails do carpenters hate to hit?

Fingernails.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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