How many efficiency experts does it take to replace a light bulb?

None. Efficiency experts replace only dark bulbs.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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What is a lion's favorite state?

Maine
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Why is Donald Trump always seen with Melania?

Because all his other wives support Hillary.
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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What can you hold without ever touching it?

A conversation.
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Why did the boy have his girlfriend put in jail?

She stole his heart.
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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