How many efficiency experts does it take to replace a light bulb?

None. Efficiency experts replace only dark bulbs.
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How many socialists does it take to change a light bulb?

One to petition the Ministry of Light for a bulb, 50 to establish the state production quota, 200 militia to force the factory unions to allow production of the bulb, and one to surreptitiously dial an "800" number to order an American light bulb.
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How can you tell that a train just went by?

It left its tracks.
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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How many WASPs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Silly, WASPs don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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What's black and white and red all over?

A blushing zebra.
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Where do fortune tellers dance?

At the crystal ball.
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