How many ergonomicists does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. Four to decide which way the bulb ought to turn, and . . .
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Why did the elephant leave the circus?

He was tired of working for peanuts.
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What do Michael Jackson and Malt Whiskey have in common?

They both come in tots.
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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I'll tell you what I love doing more than anything: trying to pack myself in a small suitcase.

I can hardly contain myself.

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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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How many TV comedians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to say "Sock it to Me." (Notes: Sock it = Socket. Also, for the infant readers among you, this was a popular catch-phrase from "Laugh In.")
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What do you call a cow that plays a musical instrument?

A Moo-sician!

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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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