How many Federal employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Sorry, that item has been cut from the budget!
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand

and says make me one with everything.
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What nails do carpenters hate to hit?

Fingernails.
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Why did the banana split?

It saw the ginger snap.
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What's the best parting gift?

A comb.
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How many militarists does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
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Went to the corner shop -

bought 4 corners.

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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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