How many Federal employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Sorry, that item has been cut from the budget!
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Do you know what the Queen's father was called?

King.
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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How many managers does it take to change a light bulb?

Nearly unanswerable, since the one who tries to change it usually drops it, and the others call for a planning session.
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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How many WASPs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Silly, WASPs don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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So I was on a train with Einstein and he turns to me and asks...

Does Boston stop at this train?
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Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon!
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