How many folk singers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two — one to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air?

A dead centipede.
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What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon.
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How do you get a trombonist off of your porch?

Pay him for the pizza

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What did the mother broom say to the baby broom?

It's time to go to sweep.
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Kleptomaniacs just don't get puns

they always take things literally.
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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What airline does Donald Trump aspire to fly?

Hair Force One!
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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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