How many folk singers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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How many Microsoft executives does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Bill Gates will just redefine Darkness® as the industry standard.
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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How many lawyer jokes are there?

Only three. The rest are true stories.
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