How many folk singers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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Why was the baseball game so hot?

Because all the fans left!
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Why did the basketball player bring his suitcase to his game?

Because he traveled a lot.
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I'm in great mood tonight because the other day I entered a competition and I won a years supply of Marmite

......... one jar.
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?

"The erection is rigged!"
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Can you use pink,yellow and green in a sentence?

. The phone went green green, and I pinked it up and said yellow.
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What goes under your feet and over your head?

A jump rope.
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What do you call 25 skydiving lawyers?

Skeet.
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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