How many freelance biotechnologists does it take to change a light bulb?

One; she designs the bulb to crawl up the wall, unscrew the old one, and screw itself in.

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How many Sound Recordists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

WHAT?

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What is Donald Trump telling all his supporters?


Orange Is The New Black.
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What's the definition of perfect pitch?

When you toss a banjo in the garbage and it hits an accordion.

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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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A man walks into a bar with a roll of tarmac under his arm and says:

"Pint please, and one for the road."

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Why was the boy sitting on his watch?

Because he wanted to be on time.

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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.

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A lorry-load of tortoises crashed into a trainload of terrapins,

What a turtle disaster

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