How many fundamentalists does it take to change a light bulb?

None; the Bible doesn't mention any light bulbs.
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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Why is slippery ice like music?

If you don't C sharp - you'll B flat!

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What do you call a pig that's been arrested for dangerous driving?

A road hog.
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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What did the ghost say to the other ghost?

Do you believe in humans?
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