How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it sure takes a shitload of light bulbs!
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How many data base people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three:

One to write the light bulb removal program,
one to write the light bulb insertion program, and

one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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How many mathematicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. He gives it to six Californians, thereby reducing the problem to an earlier joke...

In earlier work, Wiener [1] has shown that one mathematician can change a light bulb.

If k mathematicians can change a light bulb, and if one more simply watches them do it, then k+1 mathematicians will have changed the light bulb.

Therefore, by induction, for all n in the positive integers, n mathematicians can change a light bulb.

Bibliography:

[1] Wiener, Matthew P., <11485@ucbvax>, Re: YALBJ, 1986
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What is "HIJKLMNO"?

H2O.
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Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.
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What did one titration say to the other?

"Let's meet at the endpoint."
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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