How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it sure takes a shitload of light bulbs!
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Who makes the best cake on a baseball team?

The batter.
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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.
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When the attendant asked the photon if it had any bags to check

It said Nah, I'm traveling light.
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What do you call two ants that run away to get married?

Ant-elopes!
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Why did Lil Wayne go to the Doctor?

He was feeling a Lil Weezy

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What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air?

A dead centipede.
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None 'o yo' fuckin' business!
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