How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it sure takes a shitload of light bulbs!
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How many U.S marines does it take to screw in a light bulb?

50. One to screw in the light bulb and the remaining 49 to guard him .
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What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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I stayed up all night because I wanted to see where the sun went,

and then it dawned on me.
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What do you call a gorilla wearing earmuffs?

Anything you like, he can't hear you.
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Where does the snowman hide his money?

In the snow bank.
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit
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