How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it sure takes a shitload of light bulbs!
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Why was the math book sad?

It had too many problems.
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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Why did the skeleton cross the road?

To get to the body shop.
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How many TV evangelists does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But for the message of light to continue, send in your donation today.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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The oddly pleasant feeling of looking down on a physist as they drink the last of their beer.

The strange charm of a top down bottoms up.
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What does a lawyer get when you give him Viagra?

Taller
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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.
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Why did the girl throw the butter out the window?

She wanted to see a butterfly.
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