How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it sure takes a shitload of light bulbs!
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What has four legs but never stands?

A Chair!
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Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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How many Jewish renewal rabbis does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends. One, if it's an eco-kosher bulb that isn't going to be lit by electricity generated from nuclear power. Two, as long as a man and a woman rabbi have equal turns putting in the bulb. Three, one to change it, one to do a Buddhist mindfulness practice during the change, and one to document the paradigm shift in a best-selling book called The Jew in the Lightbulb. Four, same as above plus an additional rabbi to study the psycho-halachic implications of such a change and then lead a retreat weekend on the experience.
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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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What is "HIJKLMNO"?

H2O.
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