How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it sure takes a shitload of light bulbs!
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How many pre-med students does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: One to change the bulb and four to pull the ladder out from under him/her.
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Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?

He got Avogadro's number!
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.
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What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison
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How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb up a tree and act like a nut
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How many freelance biotechnologists does it take to change a light bulb?

One; she designs the bulb to crawl up the wall, unscrew the old one, and screw itself in.
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