How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it sure takes a shitload of light bulbs!
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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How many believable, competent, ``just-right-for-the-job'' presidential candidates does it take to change a light bulb?

It's going to be a dark 4 years, isn't it?
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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Where do all the letters sleep?

In the alphabed.
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