How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it sure takes a shitload of light bulbs!
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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Went to the corner shop -

bought 4 corners.

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Name four men that are in a rock group together but none of them sing nor play music...

Mt Rushmore. They're a rock group.. it's a rock...group
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Why was the sand wet?

Because the sea weed
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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest.. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win.

Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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