How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it sure takes a shitload of light bulbs!
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What did one eye say to the other?

Between you and me, something smells.
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How do you catch a tame bird?

The tame way, unique up on it!
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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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What did the class clown take a computer to school?

Her mom told her to bring in an apple for the teacher.
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What kind of band can't play music?

A rubber band.
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Why did the computer squeak?

Someone stepped on its mouse.
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Why was the sand wet?

Because the sea weed
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What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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What do you call a dinosaur that smashes everything in its path?

Tyrannosaurus wrecks.
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