How many graduate students does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it may take upwards of five years for him to get it done.
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What is on the ground and also a hundred feet in the air?

A centipede on its back!
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How many teamsters does it take to change a light bulb?

``Twelve. Ya got a problem with that?''
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How many Wardrobe people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

"Nobody said I needed doubles on that!"
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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Why did the tomato blush?

Because he saw the salad dressing!
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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How many data base people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three:

One to write the light bulb removal program,
one to write the light bulb insertion program, and

one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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What do Santa's elves drink?

Minnesoda.
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