How many grips does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to hold it, one to hammer it in.
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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How many record producers does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two… one to tell the engineer to do it, the other to say "I don't know, what do you think?"

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