How many hardware engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Any changes will have to be implemented in software.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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I’ve never gone to a gun range before.

I decided to give it a shot!
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech?

After you die, a leech stops sucking your blood.
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Why won't sharks attack lawyers?

Professional courtesy.
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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then

*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?

Hope it's Halloween!!
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What kind of cats like to go bowling?

Alley cats.
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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