How many hardware engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Any changes will have to be implemented in software.
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What happened when the butcher backed up into his meat grinder?

he got a little behind in his work.
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What's the definition of a gentleman?

One who knows how to play the saxophone, but doesn't!

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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?

Because his feet stink
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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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