How many hardware engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Any changes will have to be implemented in software.
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Whats the difference between a cat and a compound sentence?

One has claws at the end of its paws and one has a pause at the end of its clause
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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What do you call two banana peels?

Slippers.
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What did the class clown take a computer to school?

Her mom told her to bring in an apple for the teacher.
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How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?

Their lips are moving.
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Where did the sheep go on vacation?

The baaaahamas
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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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