How many hardware engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Any changes will have to be implemented in software.
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What did one titration say to the other?

"Let's meet at the endpoint."
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How many Agents does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Actually, agents will screw in just about anything.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends
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What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?

One molar solution.
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How many mystery writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two — one to screw it most of the way in and the other to give it a surprise twist at the end.
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How many lawyer jokes are there?

Only three. The rest are true stories.
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What do you get when you cross a Christmas tree with an apple?

A pineapple!
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