How many hardware engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Any changes will have to be implemented in software.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?

A kitten.
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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What do you call two ants that run away to get married?

Ant-elopes!
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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Why are there fences around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!
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What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick layer!
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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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