How many hardware engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Any changes will have to be implemented in software.
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What do you get when you cross a witch with sand?

A sandwich!
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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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What has a lot of keys but can not open any doors?

A piano.
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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Why did the spy stay in bed?

Because he was under cover.
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What's the difference between a mosquito and a lawyer?

One is a blood-sucking parasite, the other is an insect.
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Online money has recently been discovered to be a not-yet-identified super heavy element.

The proposed name is: Un-obtainium.
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