How many hardware engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Any changes will have to be implemented in software.
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What do you get when you plant a frog?

A cr-oak tree.
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I'm on a whiskey diet.

I've lost three days already.

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What airline does Donald Trump aspire to fly?

Hair Force One!
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How many teamsters does it take to change a light bulb?

``Twelve. Ya got a problem with that?''
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How do you know when the moon has enough to eat?

When it's full.
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"
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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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