How many hardware engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Any changes will have to be implemented in software.
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What`s black & white & red all over?

An embarrased mime!
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How many archaeologists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One team, but they'll label every piece of the old one, mark its location in the room, and write a detailed description before determining that it was used to store cornmeal.
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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What did the snowman say to the customer?

Have an ice day!
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Why did the tomato blush?

Because he saw the salad dressing!
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life,

but I don't want one of them for my husband".

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