How many hardware engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Any changes will have to be implemented in software.
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What does new age music sound like played backwards?

New age music.

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When are kids most likely to go to school?

When the door is open.
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Why don't they know where Mozart is buried?

Because he's Haydn.

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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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Why was the math book sad?

It had too many problems.
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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How many Marxists does it take to change a light bulb?

None. The light bulb contains the seeds of its own revolution.
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Why did the strawberry call 911?

It was in a jam!
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