How many hardware engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Any changes will have to be implemented in software.
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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What did the picture say to the wall?

I've got you covered!
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What did the pencil say to the paper?

I dot my i's on you!
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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