How many IBM engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just let Marketing explain that "Dead Bulb" is a feature.
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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How many French Horn players does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he/she will spend hours checking for technical problems.
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?

Holly Davidson.
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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What happened when the monster ate the electric company?

He was in shock for a week.
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