How many IBM engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just let Marketing explain that "Dead Bulb" is a feature.
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He was a baaaaaaaaad driver.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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Who can hold up a bus with one hand?

A crossing guard.
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What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends
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What airline does Donald Trump aspire to fly?

Hair Force One!
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