How many Italians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

I dunno exactly, but my brother's girlfriend's father's boss's secretary's sister's next-door neighbors' priest's cousin's union shop steward's uncle's Knights Of Columbus club Sergeant-of-Arms's nephew's best friend did it real cheap for me once.
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

He got caught peeping on a test.
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Went to the paper shop -

it had blown away.
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Went to the corner shop -

bought 4 corners.

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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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What do you get if you cross an insect with the Easter rabbit?

Bugs Bunny.
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What do you call lending money to a bison?

A buff-a-loan
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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?

Answer: The back of his head.
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