How many Jewish renewal rabbis does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends. One, if it's an eco-kosher bulb that isn't going to be lit by electricity generated from nuclear power. Two, as long as a man and a woman rabbi have equal turns putting in the bulb. Three, one to change it, one to do a Buddhist mindfulness practice during the change, and one to document the paradigm shift in a best-selling book called The Jew in the Lightbulb. Four, same as above plus an additional rabbi to study the psycho-halachic implications of such a change and then lead a retreat weekend on the experience.
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?

No, but hum a few bars and I'll fake it.
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Why won't sharks attack lawyers?

Professional courtesy.
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What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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Why does Donald Trump prefer E.T. to illegal immigrants?

Because E.T. eventually went home!
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What's an alligator's favorite drink?

Gator-Ade.
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How many Anglicans does it take to change a lightbulb?

A whole synod. One to move that the bulb be changed while the others debate until the room spins.
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Anyone know any jokes about sodium?

Na
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