How many junkies does it take to change a light bulb?

Oh wow, is it, like, dark, man?
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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What country makes you shiver?

Chile.
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner. "Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined. "I melt whenever I see you,"

The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through."
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What is the definition of a "crying shame"?

There was an empty seat.
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Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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