How many junkies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

``Oh wow, is it like dark, man?''
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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A Flat Major

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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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What has holes all over and holds water?

A sponge!
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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What do you call a slow skier?

A slopepoke!
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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What do you call a belt made out of watches?

A waist of time!
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I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.

Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.

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