How many junkies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

``Oh wow, is it like dark, man?''
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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What do you call two ants that run away to get married?

Ant-elopes!
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How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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What's an alligator's favorite drink?

Gator-Ade.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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Why did a boy thow a clock out the window?

To see time fly.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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