How many junkies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

``Oh wow, is it like dark, man?''
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A jump-lead walks into a bar.

The barman says "I'll serve you, but don't start anything"
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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How do you know Donald Trump is talking to you?

Cause your the only one Hair.
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Where are sharks from?

Finland.
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How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?

The fish.
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How many Einsteins does it take to change a light bulb?

That depends on the speed of the change and the mass of the bulb. Or vice versa, of course. It just might be easier to leave the bulb and change the room. It's all relative.
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That girl said she knew me from the vegitarian club,

but I'd never seen herbivore [her before]
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How many bureaucrats does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assure the everything possible is being done while the other screws the bulb into the water faucet.
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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