How many lesbians does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and two to talk about how much better it is than with a man.
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How many plastic surgeons does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he'll also want to do something about your nose.
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How do dinosaurs pay their bills?

With Tyrannosaurus checks.
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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What is a spaceman's favorite chocolate?

A marsbar!
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How many thought police does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There never was any light bulb.

Notes: Probably the only really good light bulb joke of 1984.
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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