How many Marxists does it take to change a light bulb?

None. The light bulb contains the seeds of its own revolution.
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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I wouldn't buy anything with velcro.

It's a total rip-off.
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How many French Horn players does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he/she will spend hours checking for technical problems.
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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How do you cut a wave in half?

Use a sea saw.
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Which reindeer likes to clean?

Comet
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What is a lion's favorite state?

Maine
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And the mermaid, that was weird. What was she wearing in math class?

An Algae-bra
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