How many Mensans does it take to tell Mensa light bulb jokes?

Five. One to tell the joke and one to get it.

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Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?

No, but hum a few bars and I'll fake it.

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What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.

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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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Where does the snowman hide his money?

In the snow bank.
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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What's the difference between a good lawyer and a bad lawyer?

A bad lawyer makes your case drag on for years. A good lawyer makes it last even longer.

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Do you know what the Queen's father was called?

King.
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

You crack me up!

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Why did the boy have his girlfriend put in jail?

She stole his heart.
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