How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only two, but the hard part is getting them into the light bulb.
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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk
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I rang up British Telecom, I said, "I want to report a nuisance caller",

he said "Not you again".

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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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Why did Lil Wayne go to the Doctor?

He was feeling a Lil Weezy

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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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Where do all the letters sleep?

In the alphabed.
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