How many Microsoft executives does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Bill Gates will just redefine Darkness® as the industry standard.
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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Why did they kick cinderella off the baseball team?

She kept running away from the ball.
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What did the judge say to the dentist?

Do you swear to pull the tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth?
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How many agnostics does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Agnostics question whether electricity really exists.
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How many technical writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, provided there is a programmer around to explain how to do it.
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Interesting story, the guy who helped me learn algebra never farted around anyone.

I mean he did say he was a private tutor.
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