How many Microsoft executives does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Bill Gates will just redefine Darkness® as the industry standard.
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk
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Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly. But when they lit a fire in the craft, it sank,

proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it.

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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.
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