How many Microsoft executives does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Bill Gates will just redefine Darkness® as the industry standard.
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Why does the law society prohibit sex between lawyers and their clients?

To prevent clients from being billed twice for essentially the same service.
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and God?

God doesn't think he's a lawyer.
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How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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What's round and bad-tempered?

A vicious circle.
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What does a lawyer get when you give him Viagra?

Taller
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Where do all the letters sleep?

In the alphabed.
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What do you call a cow that plays a musical instrument?

A Moo-sician!

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