How many Microsoft executives does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Bill Gates will just redefine Darkness® as the industry standard.
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How many managers does it take to change a light bulb?

Nearly unanswerable, since the one who tries to change it usually drops it, and the others call for a planning session.
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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What would happen if pigs could fly?

The price of bacon would go up.
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What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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What did the guitarist do when his teacher told him to turn his amplifier on?

He caressed it softly and told it that he loved it

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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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Why did Mozart kill his chickens?

Because they always ran around going "Bach! Bach! Bach!"

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When can't you see a cheese?

When it's pasteurised...
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What do you call a boomerang that won't come back?

A stick.
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