How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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How do dinosaurs pay their bills?

With Tyrannosaurus checks.
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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