How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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How many hardware engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Any changes will have to be implemented in software.
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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What do you get if you enroll in a liberal arts program and the only subject you do well in is music?

A natural major.
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Where do fortune tellers dance?

At the crystal ball.
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How do you know an elephant has been in your refrigerator?

There are footprints in the butter.
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