How many orgy attenders does it take to change a lightbulb?

As many as possible, and don't *ask* what they do with the old bulb.
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How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"
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What's the difference between in-laws and outlaws?

Outlaws are wanted.
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What kind of dress can't be worn?

Address.
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What goes 99 thump,99 thump,99 thump?

A centipede with a wooden leg.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?

The banana split
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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