How many PA' does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What's a light bulb?
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What do you get if you enroll in a liberal arts program and the only subject you do well in is music?

A natural major.
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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner. "Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined. "I melt whenever I see you,"

The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through."
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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Why do you think Civil Disobedience was such a fantastic essay?

Thoreau editing Thorough.
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He made an illegal ewe turn.
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