How many pre-med students does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: One to change the bulb and four to pull the ladder out from under him/her.
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My pastor, he ate too many beans.

He had in his own pews.
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What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends
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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck
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There were two cows in a paddock. One of the cows says, "moo"

and the other one says, "That's what I was going to say."
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If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?

H2O cubed.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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What has holes all over and holds water?

A sponge!
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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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