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How many professors does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one, but they get three tech. reports out of it.
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Why did the oreo go to the dentist?
To get his filling!
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What do you call a fish without an eye?
Fsh
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I bought some shoes off of a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with
but I've been trippin' all day.
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What element is a girl's future best friend?
Carbon.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?
A car only has one horn.
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?
Decalfinated
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What is a lion's favorite state?
Maine
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How do you fix a broken brass instrument?
With a Tuba glue.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me
Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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