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How many "pro-lifers" does it take to change a light bulb?
Six: two to screw in the bulb and four to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.
None; the bulb will change itself when it is ready.
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What is the best thing to do if you find a gorilla in your bed?
Sleep somewhere else.
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What do you call a mad elephant?
An earthquake.
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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?
Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Just one more, guys, I promise.
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What did Delaware?
A New Jersey.
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Were does a boat go when it is sick?
To the dock.
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What do Russians use for napkins?
Soviets
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?
coz Donald ducked
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How do you stop an elephant from charging?
Take away his credit card
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