How many "pro-lifers" does it take to change a light bulb?

Six: two to screw in the bulb and four to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.
None; the bulb will change itself when it is ready.
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb up a tree and act like a nut
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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What has 4 wheels, gives milk, and eats grass.

A cow on a skateboard.
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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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Whats Donald Trump's favorite nation?

Discrimination.
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