How many Real Men does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Real Men aren't afraid of the dark.
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How is Donald Trump going to create middle class jobs?

By paying them to cheer for him during campaign events.
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How many Ukrainians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None, because people who glow in the dark don't need light bulbs.

Note: Topical to the Chernobyl Reactor disaster of 1984.
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself.

The blonde responds to the husband, "Shut up...you're next!"
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What do you call a gorilla wearing earmuffs?

Anything you like, he can't hear you.
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?

Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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What does one bucket say to the other?

I am feeling pale today.
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Well, first let's talk about the concept behind this whole "light bulb" thing.
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