How many referral agents does it take to change a light bulb?

Two: One to screw you out of a fee, and the other to send you to a store where they ran out of bulbs weeks ago.
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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How does a pig go to hospital?

In a hambulance.
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How do dinosaurs pay their bills?

With Tyrannosaurus checks.
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I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah;

I thought, "He's trying to pull a fast one".

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What do dinosaurs and decent lawyers have in common?

They're both extinct.
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What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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What does cheese like to drink?

Morbier
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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