How many shaggy dogs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Fewer than it takes to screw in a heavy bulb.
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What do you call two ants that run away to get married?

Ant-elopes!
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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What did the laywer name his daughter?

Sue.
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