How many socialists does it take to change a light bulb?

One to petition the Ministry of Light for a bulb, 50 to establish the state production quota, 200 militia to force the factory unions to allow production of the bulb, and one to surreptitiously dial an "800" number to order an American light bulb.
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What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?

"The erection is rigged!"
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to take notes while the other screws it into the faucet.
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Who makes dinosaur clothes?

A dino-sewer.
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How do you fix a broken brass instrument?

With a Tuba glue.

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Why do ducks fly south?

Because it's too far to walk!
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How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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Name four men that are in a rock group together but none of them sing nor play music...

Mt Rushmore. They're a rock group.. it's a rock...group
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What do you call a parrot that flew away?

A polygon
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