How many teamsters does it take to change a light bulb?

``Twelve. Ya got a problem with that?''
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?

One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
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Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks.

They charged one - and let the other one off.

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What can you put in a barrel to make it lighter?

Holes.
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Why did New Jersey get all the toxic waste and California all the lawyers?

New Jersey got to pick first.
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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.
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What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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