How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"
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Why didn't the rooster cross the road?

Because it was chicken.
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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Where do you learn to make banana splits?

In sundae school.
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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What did the light bulb say to its mother?

I wuv you watts and watts.
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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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