How many times does Bill Clinton change a light bulb?

No one knows. Republicans automatically disbelieve him, and no one can ever trust a stinking liberal anyway.

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How did Ben Franklin feel after discovering electricity?

Shocked.
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I wouldn't buy anything with velcro.

It's a total rip-off.
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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Some lettuce, an egg, and a faucet had a race. What was the result?

The lettuce came in ahead, the egg got beat and the faucet is still running.
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Why did the sun go to school?

To get brighter!

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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.

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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.

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How did the butcher introduce his wife?

Meet Patty.

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