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How many times does Bill Clinton change a light bulb?
No one knows. Republicans automatically disbelieve him, and no one can ever trust a stinking liberal anyway.
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What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?
The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?
A try and try and try-ceratops
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What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?
"The erection is rigged!"
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?
Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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What do you call a fish without an eye?
Fsh
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?
An in-car-nation.
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What do you get if you cross an insect with the Easter rabbit?
Bugs Bunny.
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How do hair stylists speed up their job?
They take short cuts!
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What did the flag say to the pole?
Nothing, it just waved.
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