How many times does Bill Clinton change a light bulb?

No one knows. Republicans automatically disbelieve him, and no one can ever trust a stinking liberal anyway.
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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.
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Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.
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How many Jewish renewal rabbis does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends. One, if it's an eco-kosher bulb that isn't going to be lit by electricity generated from nuclear power. Two, as long as a man and a woman rabbi have equal turns putting in the bulb. Three, one to change it, one to do a Buddhist mindfulness practice during the change, and one to document the paradigm shift in a best-selling book called The Jew in the Lightbulb. Four, same as above plus an additional rabbi to study the psycho-halachic implications of such a change and then lead a retreat weekend on the experience.
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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How many graduate students does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it may take upwards of five years for him to get it done.
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What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?

One molar solution.
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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean
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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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