How many TV comedians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to say "Sock it to Me." (Notes: Sock it = Socket. Also, for the infant readers among you, this was a popular catch-phrase from "Laugh In.")
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Why was the baseball player arrested in the middle of the game?

He was caught stealing second base.
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Interesting story, the guy who helped me learn algebra never farted around anyone.

I mean he did say he was a private tutor.
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Name four men that are in a rock group together but none of them sing nor play music...

Mt Rushmore. They're a rock group.. it's a rock...group
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How do you catch a unique bird?

Unique up on it.
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What did Jay-z call his wife before they got married?

Feyonce

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Why did the melon jump into the lake?

It wanted to be a watermelon.
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Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?

He took them to a pignic.
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How many supply-siders does it take to change a light bulb?

None. The darkness will cause the bulb to change by itself.
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison
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