How many UNIX hacks does it take to change a light bulb?

As many as you want; they're all virtual anyway.
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How many board meetings does it take to get a light bulb changed?

This topic was resumed from last week's discussion, but is incomplete pending resolution of some action items. It will be continued next week. Meanwhile . . .
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Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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How many plastic surgeons does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he'll also want to do something about your nose.
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Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?

No, but hum a few bars and I'll fake it.
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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.
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How many Marxists does it take to change a light bulb?

None. The light bulb contains the seeds of its own revolution.
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What did the mother broom say to the baby broom?

It's time to go to sweep.
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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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