How many UNIX hacks does it take to change a light bulb?

As many as you want; they're all virtual anyway.
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Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?

From chasing parked ambulances.
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What do envelopes say when you lick them?

Nothing, it shuts them up!
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to take notes while the other screws it into the faucet.
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