How many UNIX hacks does it take to change a light bulb?

As many as you want; they're all virtual anyway.
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What do you call a belt made out of watches?

A waist of time!
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How many archaeologists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One team, but they'll label every piece of the old one, mark its location in the room, and write a detailed description before determining that it was used to store cornmeal.
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What's the one thing that never works when it's fixed?

A jury.
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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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How many engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

First they have to agree on which is better; the analog bulb or a digital bulb.
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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What do sea monsters eat for lunch?

Fish and ships.
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Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.
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What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?

A good start!
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