How many UNIX hacks does it take to change a light bulb?

As many as you want; they're all virtual anyway.
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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.
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How did the bubble gum cross the road?

On the bottom of the chicken's foot!
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Why was the mouse afraid of the water?

Catfish
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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"My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance.

We'll see about that."

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How many orgy attenders does it take to change a lightbulb?

As many as possible, and don't *ask* what they do with the old bulb.
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Where do soldiers keep their armies?

In their Sleevies!
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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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There was a rooster sitting on a top of a barn. If it laid an egg, which way would it roll?

Roosters don't lay eggs!
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