I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.

Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.

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How do crows stick together in a flock?

Velcrow.
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How many brewers does it take to change a light bulb?

About one third less than for a regular bulb.
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Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.
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What's the difference between a mosquito and a lawyer?

One is a blood-sucking parasite, the other is an insect.
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Why did the cookie go to the Doctor?

Because he was feeling crumby.
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What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy
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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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How many efficiency experts does it take to replace a light bulb?

None. Efficiency experts replace only dark bulbs.
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