I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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And the mermaid, that was weird. What was she wearing in math class?

An Algae-bra
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What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?

"The erection is rigged!"
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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A man goes to a zoo and discovers there is only one animal and it's a dog.

It was a Shih Tzu
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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I bought some shoes off of a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with

but I've been trippin' all day.
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