I rang up British Telecom, I said, "I want to report a nuisance caller",

he said "Not you again".

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How many members of the United Church of Canada does it take to change a light bulb?

How dare you be so intolerant! So what if the light bulb has chosen an alternative light-style?
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How many Zen masters does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A tree in a golden forest.
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What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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Who says sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me?

A guy who has never been hit with a dictionary.
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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?

None, because they were copycats
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