I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah;

I thought, "He's trying to pull a fast one".

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How many anarchists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

All of them.
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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Why did the student eat her homework?

Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake!
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How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Uh...standby, I'll check on that.
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How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
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How do you know when its Michael Jacksons bed time ?

When the big hand touches the little hand
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Who makes the best cake on a baseball team?

The batter.
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How many televangelists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. Televangelists screw in motels.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo?

The lawyer charges more.
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