I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.
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Why did the drum take a nap?

It was beat.
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Why are kindergarten teachers so good?

They can make little things count.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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How do hair stylists speed up their job?

They take short cuts!
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What kind of table has no legs.

A multiplication table.
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