I tried water polo but my horse drowned.
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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A man goes to a zoo and discovers there is only one animal and it's a dog.

It was a Shih Tzu
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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What's black and white and red all over?

A blushing zebra.
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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What do you call a young army?

Infantry.
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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